Happy Computer Geek Day!

Fathers Day.....

I know there is a large percentage of people who question the need for all of the special recognition days that have become more or less an excuse to patronize the Hallmark card company. For some it has become a hassle and feels contrived to be forced to buy Valentines, flowers for Mom, a tie for Dad on a chosen day that has been deemed as "the" day by the powers that be. 

I'm not one of those that balks at the tradition of having a day chosen at random for me to remember the people in my life who have had a big influence on me. I like the memories that remain from my childhood and those with my own children of staying up to stuff Valentines for school or finding that small gift that will be just right in my limited budget. We get so busy with the rest of life and we miss the chance to stop and say "I love you". 

Not everyone was as blessed as I was to have a childhood home that was free of abuse, free of alcohol, but abundant with boundaries and rules, and Saturday morning chores, and Monday night family time. Most of all I knew my parents loved me. No family is perfect, but as I get older I can see how rare my mostly ideal upbringing was. Fathers Day for me each year was void of any uncomfortable shuttling between step parents or having to fake well wishes to someone that was secretly my enemy. If you are there, I hope that you find peace and love and forgiveness. I can only imagine how hard it must be for you. I hope that you can one day fill these traditions and make your own good memories like mine were. 

To my Dad, I love you. I know you don't feel like you were the perfect father, but you were for me. You gave me love, stability, a perfect example of what it means to be a faithful husband, a home where respect and work was taught. There was food for every meal, doctors when I was sick, a dentists care, a center of Christ, and correction when I was wrong. You encouraged my seeking of talents, supported my education, and listened to my teenage complaints of injustice. You were my taxi, and my protector, and my cheer section. 

In your acknowledgement of your own imperfections as a parent you taught me to continue to seek for improvements in myself as a parent and ask for forgiveness from my children when I was wrong. 

I didn't need the trips to Hawaii and the designer jeans. I needed to know how to budget. I didn't need the mansion with the maid. I needed to know how to work at home. I didn't need the "cool" dad. I needed the tall gangly knock kneed engineer geek who loves computers and gadgets. I learned how to be ok with being a smart girl who is good on the computer. Most of all I needed a real man who truly loved my mom and taught me what a good marriage looks like. 

I don't know if I ever told you this, but right before my divorce it was your example that helped me to know it was the step I needed to take. I had gone out to dinner with you and mom and afterward we took a walk out on the dock over the water next to the restaurant. I watched you both hold hands as we walked along the wooden boards. Even though you had been married many years I could see how sweet and loving and genuinely still in love my parents were. 

I understood that night that I would never be able to have that in my current marriage. It was one of those turning points that I still can see in my mind. It gave me the insight that helped me to make some tough choices. It wasn't easy but it was the right choice for me. 

I have that kind of marriage now that I can walk holding hands and know that my husband is genuinely in love with me and always will be. He's the computer loving geek who helps me be the smart girl and I love him for that. 

So happy Fathers Day to you and to my sweet husband. Thank you both for being patient and loving with this very stubborn girl. I know it was my Heavenly Father's gift to me to have sent you both to me. In a way, this day is not so much for what gift or card I can give to you but that I can say thank you because I was the one who was given the gift of a Father who was perfectly imperfect, and a husband who is more in love with me the longer we are together. 

I am a very blessed woman. 

I love you both with all my heart.

"Nucular" Woman

Okey dokey! So now I am emitting little invisible doses of radiation. Or "nucular" as G.W.B. was famous for saying. I took my radioactive iodine pill yesterday at the hospital and now all I have to do is lay low for a few days and no kissing with the hubby. :( No, i dont feel any different. I only need one dose and it doesnt make me feel sick. The best kind of cancer treatment! I am sleeping in the spare bedroom and I have to make sure and wipe down anything that is potentially contaminated. My toilet has never been so clean! It gets a regular wiping down several times a day! Drink, pee, drink, pee, repeat.

Good news is I finally get started on my synthroid now and I got my first dose today. Yay! I may as yet get back to feeling normal again, sometime........whatever normal was. At least I know where the bottom is and I survived. My goal now is one year from now to be stronger and leaner.

 True Joy when children choose to live good lives. 

 My cute daughter Kari went to the Temple for her Endowments yesterday. (you can find more info on Temples at www.mormon.org) So pleased at her commitments to keep on the right path. Gina was her surrogate mom for me. Thanks sweetheart. I love you both. Kari and Jonathan will be doing their sealing in about a month and I will look forward to being there with them for that.

 My cute son Evan submitted the first part of his mission papers this last week. He will make an awesome missionary! It's hard to believe that my little boy is already at this step. How did this happen so fast? I'm so excited for him.

 Gina and BJ have a happy little family that is blooming. Kenley is a chatty 2 yr old. Can't wait to give her lots of gramma hugs in a few weeks.

 Chris and Kari working hard and loving each other. They have plans and goals they are working to accomplish. (chris....you got a true angel wife) I am such a lucky mom to have been blessed with the privilege to be a part of these lives.

I love you all so much.